


At Peace

by Anonymous



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: CANT TAG?? MORE LIKE CANT TITLE, Hurt/Comfort, I FORGOT TO SAY, I NEVER KNOW WHAT TO TITLE THESE, It was a simulation, M/M, Post-Game, Self-Harm, breakdown - Freeform, i don’t know how to tag, i think, idk what else to tag, just in case, shuichi Has a breakdown because he feels guilty, shuichi and I having survivors guilt let’s bond over that, this is kind of a vent ??, vent - Freeform, whoopsie daisy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:16:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27587327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: It was a quiet and peaceful night, the moon was bright in the sky and Shuichi had an overall good day.At least, he thought it would be.
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 70
Collections: anonymous





	At Peace

**Author's Note:**

> hi hiii!! It seems the only stuff I can write anymore is sad things :(( hmm, that’s unfortunate but oh well!! If I need to tag anything, please tell me.
> 
> anyways this was originally a vent because I too would like someone to comfort me after I have a breakdown and tell me it wasn’t my fault but . whatever !!

It was a quiet and peaceful night, the moon was bright in the sky and Shuichi had an overall good day. 

At least, he thought it would be.

He had been in such a good mood, but something had tipped him off. Something ugly and rotten, he guessed. Guilt, that’s all he ever felt anymore. Even on his good days, he still heard Akamatsu’s body thumping down on piano keys and the bone-chilling crunch of the hydraulic press.

He felt hot tears roll down his face, his breathing coming out as ragged sobs as he clutches his head and pulls his hair. He needed to  _ hurt  _ something, someone,  _ anything _ . Tear his arm apart with his teeth, scratch his skin till it bleeds, cut all of his hair off and stare at the bits on the floor. 

Shuichi feels so sick, so gross as he hears Ouma’s chilled tone. 

_ I’m alone, right? That’s what you said?  _

He cries harder at that, he’s so angry with himself and he isn’t sure what’s wrong anymore. So many things, there were so many things that were wrong that he had lost count. Why had he even let Akamatsu die? Why had he let anyone die? 

It was all his fault, wasn’t it? 

It had to be—yes it was. Their(?) blood was all over his hands, bright against his skin. It’s oozing, dripping everywhere. He feels sick again as he hears things shatter and hit the ground, he can barely even hear himself cry. There’s pain searing all over his body, in his arms and his fingers. His legs feel sore from how many times he had hit them, he can see them already changing color. It hurts it hurts  _ it hurts it hurts it hurts- _

There are so many voices all at once, calling him cruel and heartless and a  _ murderer _ . 

That’s what he was, right? He hadn’t been any better than a blackened, in the end. He clutched at the ground, trying to deny it.

But that was the truth, wasn’t it? 

He was terrible. Shuichi let out a wail, hitting his fist against the ground as he screamed his lungs out. Screamed until he passed out, hoping the pain wouldn’t follow him into his sleep.

~

“Shit—Shuichi!” A voice roused him from his dreamless sleep, he looked up at Kokichi with bleary eyes.

“Kichi…” He murmured. “You’re here…” a smile on his face as he reached his sore arm out to touch him. “Haha...Kokichi-kun, I’m sorry, I made it all a mess.”

“Don’t worry about it right now—here,” Kokichi helped him up, pulling him out of the room and around the pieces of glass. He led Shuichi to the bathroom, pulling out the medkit they kept in there. 

“I’m sorry for leaving for so long,” Kokichi said as he began disinfecting the gashes in Shuichi’s arm. Had he done those? Some of them were teeth-marks and the other long cuts that must’ve been from the glass. His fingernails had broken too...

Shuichi took a deep breath. “It’s okay,” he spoke weakly, wincing as the wounds stung. “I’m sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault, Shu. You don’t have any control over stuff like this.” Kokichi smiled at him as he began wrapping gauze around his arms. “It’s okay.”

“It isn’t.” Shuichi hissed. “I can’t keep doing this, Kokichi. I’m tired, I’m so tired of it…” Tears started to run down his cheeks. “I want to be better, you believe me right?”

“Of course I believe you. You’re doing what you’re able to. You need to take your-“

“It’s been months!” Shuichi hissed in frustration. “I want to be better, so why can’t I? How come everyone gets to move on but me?!”

“Shuichi, you...you’re different from everyone else.” Kokichi’s tone was gentle and soft, as though he were talking to a frightened animal. “You had to figure everything out, all of the blackened and the victims…” he traced the gauze, the calm expression never fading. “Everyone takes their time. You’ll get better one day,”’

“Why are you still with me,” Shuichi mumbled, tearing his eyes away from Kokichi. It was all...far too much. He wondered why Kokichi hadn’t left him to rot nearly every day. Why Kokichi had kept visiting him in the hospital, why he had been so forgiving to him when Shuichi had shown him nothing but cruelty in his last few days alive in the simulation. 

“Why…? Hmm, it might be because I love you. And even if I didn’t, I still want to see you get better.” Kokichi grabbed one of his bandaged hands and pressed a kiss to it, a smile on his face as Shuichi finally met his eyes again. “Shu-chan has done so much for me, I don’t know why I can’t do it for him.” 

“I…” Shuichi sighed and closed his eyes. “I’ll help you clean up.”

“Nah, you should get to bed for now. I’ll join you when I’m done.” Kokichi gave him a warm smile, turning to leave the bathroom. “We can have an easy day tomorrow, Shu. Let's sleep all day or something, that sound good?”

Shuichi nodded, “Yeah...yeah it does. Goodnight, Kichi.” 

He crawled into bed after that, cautious with his bandaged and bruised limbs. Shuichi closed his eyes and sighed as his head met the pillow. What a terrible day. 

Shuichi couldn’t even go to sleep now, even though he was still exhausted. He was embarrassed that Kokichi had to patch him up  _ again _ , irritated that he had destroyed their living room again and—

Why couldn’t he just get better? Why did he have to be so stuck in the past? He hadn’t even died in the simulation, so why...why did it feel like he had? 

Shuichi hears Kokichi come into the room a few minutes later and look him over. “Asleep...that’s good.” He laid down next to Shuichi, bringing the blanket up to cover both of them. “I’m sorry, Shuichi.” He spoke softly, as though he were afraid to wake him up. “I...I hope one day you’ll know it wasn’t any of your fault. Until then, I’ll keep telling you.” He pressed a kiss to Shuichi’s forehead and placed his hand over Shuichi’s. “I love you.”

Shuichi shifted and opened his eyes. 

“You’re still awake?”

“Yeah,” Shuichi mumbled. “I can’t sleep.”

“Hmm, is Shuichi in the mood for my lovely cuddling? Will that help him any?” 

“Maybe..” 

“Very well, I’ll do my very best for him.” Kokichi laughed lightly before shifting closer and wrapping his arms around him carefully. “Good?” Kokichi asked as he nuzzled into him.

“Good. And um...you meant that? What you said?”

“I meant it,” Kokichi said firmly. “I’ll say whatever you need to hear. I love you.”

“I love you too. Thank you.” Shuichi closed his eyes, feeling himself slowly give way into sleep. 

Kokichi’s warmth put his heart at peace, for the moment.

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed, eat well and drink lots of water!! 
> 
> ~Bee


End file.
